Real Food???

Well since I left you all at the edge of your seats wondering what crazy new diet I am on (the real food diet/lifestyle) I figured I better explain. There is much confusion about what I eat. When I say that I don't want to eat animals that were treated cruelly, I do not mean that I am a vegetarian. If you ever asked me what I eat I may have said vegetarian just because it is much easier to say that than to explain what I really am. That, and if I really got into it your eyes may glaze over in less than 30 seconds. But since you are here, trapped (cuz it's not like you could close this page at any time) I will explain. I feel called to eat foods that honor the earth, the animals, other people, and my own body. In short I want to honor all of God's creation. There are too many people groups that have survived from eating other animals, so I am not about to tell them they were wrong to consume another life. Also if memory serves, it was God who killed the first animal to provide clothing for Adam and Eve. While not ideal, consuming animals is one way we have been directed to for our survival. Finally I really and truly believe that life comes from life. Even vegans are indirectly taking life to prolong their own. When a field is cleared to grow soy beans, the wild animals inhabiting that field are sacrificed-gophers, mice, wild birds loose their homes and shelter. So that said, I am not delusional to think that my life continues without costing another's, and I find a position taken by some Native Americans to be more in unison with my own, which honors and thanks the life given to provide for my own.

You are probably thinking that I really haven't explained what I eat. You are right. So let's get to it. I try my best (I am flexible with my diet, trying to accommodate as different circumstances arise) to eat locally, and organic, or at least pesticide free vegetables, fruit, and herbs. I try to eat pastured (as in raised on a pasture, grazing in grass), or free-range (yes there is a difference, and if you really want to know what that is, ask in the comments and I will explain) meats, eggs, and dairy. It can be tricky finding foods that meet these criteria, but I have had the most success at farmer's markets. Also, remember that I am flexible, so I don't starve because I cannot find food that meet all the criteria. Now regarding dairy, I try to stay away from pasteurized (please do not confuse this with pastured-these are two very different things) because it leads to stuffy sinuses, and allergy attacks, or sinus infection (I try to avoid gluten-and sometimes citrus-for this same reason). I do however, eat raw dairy, and have found that it doesn't have as severe an affect on me. WooHoo!!! Cuz I have missed my quesadillas.

I just recently bought some raw milk and it was nice to drink milk like that, it has been a while. I plan on making some gluten-free cookies this weekend and having them with a glass of cold raw milk. Yum!!! Funny how excited I get over simple things like that, since I have had to go without those things for a long time. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, indeed!

The REAL part of my diet is the idea that I try to eat as many whole foods as possible. No foods with scary expiration dates/preservatives, chemical dyes, high fructose corn syrup, or instant meals. The idea is that I would live a life style where I make most of my foods, like folks did in the preindustrial era. That is the REAL part of the Real Food diet. It is taking us back to our preindustrial revolution roots. I think the main words behind this movement would be simple, whole, balance, and quality. This is a lifestyle not simply a diet. It is one that seems to encompass all the elements that I value, and it leads me to a life that I am already striving for. A life of dignity, honor, balance, wholeness, truth, and love.

So I can eat pretty much anything, as long as it is organic, whole, pastured, preservative-free, natural, and locally grown. Luckily McDonald's and Taco Bell's menus are just that! *wink*

Not dead...I promise!

I seriously doubt if anyone out there is still reading this, but if you are I just wanted to tell you that I am still here. Finished one year of teaching and am in the second year now. Started a masters program, dropped out, and am lined up to start another. Have two dogs now. Moved to Anaheim (a stones throw away from Disneyland!). Still working two jobs. Have converted to a Real Foods Diet (more on that to come) and am thrilled with it! It is good for my body and my soul.

Still crafting/creating, though not as often as I would like. Am currently working on completing a granny square baby blanket. Have successfully made gluten-free cookies, banana bread, stuffing, green bean casserole, pancakes, and pies!

Before I sign-off, a funny story courtesy of one of my 1st grade students: We were working on our journal entry and the theme was "Snowflakes are..." and she wrote "Snowflakes are pretty. I wish they were made of chocolate. I like chocolate." I laughed so hard when I read that. Aren't kids great!

Hope to be back soon!

Dog-Sitting

About a week ago we dog sat for a friend. And this week we are doing the same for a different friend. I am not really sure how we keep getting ourselves in these positions. Probably because we have dogs, love dogs, and now have a yard. I don't really mind, but I am starting to wonder if maybe we should start a business? You see we aren't the type to just put our dogs in the back yard and check up on them for 5 minutes a day. I just don't feel right about doing that. Though I did come from that home...you know, the one that just left a big ole' bucket of water and a big ole' bucket of dog food whenever we went on a trip. Yup, that was my family.

Well I didn't feel right about it then, and I don't feel right about it now. So of course each time we dog-sit it becomes a task that requires far more than I ever anticipate. We provide 5-star service here at Hotel Starriaza (Stier + Arriaza). And, truthfully, my husband ends up doing most of the work because he is physically at home more than I am. So I was thinking, since we are doing so much extra work maybe we should start up a business and charge a small fee. What do you think?

I would love to believe that it would be a huge success, but places like this already exist (dog hotels). Aaaand, people ask us because we are free, and they don't wanna pay. And like that a dream is crushed. You just witnessed it, mark it down in your journals. Well, at least we now have people who owe us a favor should the need and time ever come.

I have to go, Lucky can't find his doggie bed...

A long way yet to go...

It was hot today, so I wore a spaghetti strapped shirt. Makes sense right? Well let me take you back to a time when I was so scared to wear anything that showcased my femininity. I could hardly get myself to wear anything that might be mildly form-fitting. As you might have guessed this fear stems from abuse I suffered. And thanks be to God that I have worked through many of my fears and wounds. And so here I am a grown woman not afraid to wear a spaghetti strap shirt on a hot summer day until...

I walked into a store to buy some baking soda and when I approached the register there were two men "checking me out", but it wasn't flattering to me at all. This wasn't an innocent "checking out" (which I have noticed before and was not alarmed by). This was different. It felt dirty. I felt vulnerable and suddenly wished I had a sweatshirt on. And I felt like I had done something wrong, like I had provoked these men. Of course I know this is a reaction stemming out of my wounded past, but it was my response nonetheless. What is worse is that the cashier was busy doing something forcing me to linger longer than I wanted at the register, allowing those men to continue to stare, adding to my discomfort.

Friends, I wish I could tell you how I conquered those feelings, left with my head help high, striding with confidence and the power of the strong woman I aim to be. But I didn't. I kept my head down...typical victim. I rushed out of there as quick as I could trying to be strong but knowing I wreaked of anxiety. And I write to you out of anger and pain. Anger at myself for being so weak, for showing how far I have yet to go on my path to healing. Pain because it hurts to be reminded of things better left in the dark and hidden past. But I share this because where there is light darkness cannot abide. I share this because I have found that carrying the pains of these stories is made easier when many carry my story with me.

Shame on men who think it is okay to stare at women as objects! Shame on them who with their eyes send crude messages and evil thoughts. When they reduce me to breast, ass, and c**t, they have no idea they are missing my true beauty, my true light, and my unconquerable spirit. I am more than the sum of my body parts! And praise God for that!

To Keep or Not to Keep That Is the Question

The other day some friends and I were talking about our hoarding practices. I am by nature a pack-rat. I can find some reason to keep anything I own: "I might wear that again someday...you never know, styles come in and out!" "But what if I need that one day? I know the second I give this away I am gonna need it and have to buy a new one, so I am really saving money buy keeping it!" etc. This got me wondering where this came from. Why am I like this?

I am not sure exactly, but I think it is related to my childhood poverty. In the grand scope of things, we weren't truly poor, especially compared to others, but we did pinch and save, and struggle a bit here and there. I have one vivid memory of wanting to get some Fruit Stripe Zebra Gum (remember that?) and my mom telling me she couldn't afford it. I could see how she hated denying me that small gift, and I never wanted her to feel that way again. Somehow I think this story is part of the formation of my inner pack-rat.

But recently I have been wondering if that is what I want to be. One of my friends said she is a purger, to excess sometimes. We giggled over her tales of realizing she gave too many clothes away and had nothing left to wear. Yet at the same time I found myself drawn to her ways.

I have moved quite a bit over the last 5 years, and each time I do I have the burden of moving all my hoarded items. And I haven't enjoyed it. Each time I get rid of stuff, but never quite enough.

And now I wonder if what I am holding onto is worth holding onto. They say when you die you can't take your treasures with you. Maybe I need to spend less time collecting items, and more time collecting experiences. There is a purifying element to purging, a cleansing.

Perhaps a purging of past memories is what is needed, and the first step is to outwardly purge, that I would invite my soul to an inward release and cleansing...

A bit of everything...

I got back on Tuesday from a trip to Guatemala. We originally went for a wedding, and also so Jonathan could visit this beautiful country where I spent many of my childhood summers. We did way more than we ever anticipated.

There was:

a wedding

a funeral

a mob riot/lynching we narrowly avoided

an earthquake

fine dining

home cooked meals

bootleg dvd browsing

volcano climbing

exploring ancient religious ruins

priceless stories

time with family

spooking a dog

and so much more.

It was an amazing trip!

Thanks Mom and Dad.

Is it too early?

The date is September 3, 2009. Too early for Christmas music? I couldn’t help myself. I mean you should be proud of me, I held off all the way through August. But today, facing the long ride in to work, I couldn’t restrain myself. I was not in the mood for morning radio. I just wanted something happy, and soothing, and something that would lift me up and take me to a light place. So in went Vince Guaraldi’s A Charlie Brown Christmas. Isn’t that just the best Christmas album ever! I think it is one of the best albums ever, period. Sooo great. The moment Vince’s fingers dance over the keys I am transported to a place free of stress and full of youthful hope and innocence. I listen to this album all year long. Ask my hubby, who tries to understand my obsession but is perplexed by “Silent Night” in the middle of May. But if you ask me, it is not to early. It’s not possible for it to be too early, not for this album anyway.