Tuesday, November 6, 2007

4 Days of Singleness

Last night I went to Disneyland with Jonathan. I needed it. We shouldn't have gone because his family had just flown in and were visiting and we hadn't seen them all day. But I was panicking. I am getting married in 4 days, and well the thing is, I hate change. And this is going to be a big change. And I am scared. There I said it.

So I needed to take an evening to be with Jonathan at the "Happiest Place on Earth", and remember how much I have been longing for this day. And be reminded of how lucky and blessed I have been to have a wonderful person want to spend the rest of his life with me. It was a very needed night out, and it was wonderful!

We watched the "Parade of Dreams". I have seen it many times before, but this time we watched it from a raised sitting area near It's a Small World, quite comfy really. I waved at Belle, Ariel, and Simba, and sang along with the beautifully dressed dancers "Welcome to our Family time, welcome to our brotherly time..." And it rushed over me, as if I was a five year old girl being swept away by the magic of it all, this is my family time. Time for my old family, time for my soon-to-be family, and time to start my new family. It's this last family that I am most excited about. I am so happy to finally have a home, and that home is wherever Jonathan and I are. And maybe in the future we will add some little ones to that home, like a corgi, or a beagle. And I am so excited for that. And just like that the panic dissipated (though it keeps creeping back randomly throughout the day).

This has been such a long process. It was a year ago that Jonathan finally asked me to marry him. We had been dating for 4 years at that point and I was READY! I had just moved into a house with 8 other girls (eek!) , strangers to me, and had been feeling like an outsider. They all were very kind, and I have since come to love them all so much! But seeing as how they were all students with the wacky schedule students are bound to have, it was a rare occasion if we were ever all home at the same time. But for some reason on this particular night, all 8 girls were home, and staying up and waiting for me to come home. And waiting to see if Jonathan finally did it...And he did!!!! And there was much laughter, and smiles, and giggles, and screaming. And for the first time we took our house portrait:

Aren't they all beautiful! And yes Jonathan is in the portrait, because he is the honorary house-mate/handyman. My love! Isn't he cute!

Okay, so that was a happy night for us! There was much rejoicing, merriment, and general holiday cheer! And here we are again, two winks away from Thanksgiving and Christmas, and I am going to be married in 4 days!!! I can hardly believe that it has been a year. It went by so fast. So much has happened in that time. I am sure that in another year I will be saying the same thing.

So here's to another year, to the adventures before me, the fear within me, and the blessings of love, in all it's faces and forms!

And here is to silly pictures! To Christmas trees! To hugging arms! And to you for reading all the way through this! Next time I post I will be a married woman...